Who Am I Tonight
by anythingzombie
Summary: ***1st place in the Jekyll and Cullen contest!*** AH/AU: He knew he was wrong, he knew what he was doing and he knew he couldn't stop. He's at war with himself, but he is rooting for the enemy. Him. His name is Alec, and he's lost.


**Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Cullen Contest**

**Pen name: anythingzombie**

**Title: Who Am I Tonight**

**Word Count: 7,948**

**Rating: M**

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* * *

Who Am I Tonight**

"Is this it? Is this how I have spent my life? Lying there with a broken heart on bedroom floors?  
And finally, finally I realize, I realize that I'm only a man."

_Story About a Man with a Bad Hear_t; Emery

* * *

Lights bounced off the linoleum floor and quickly bounced onto the dance floor that was set up in the backyard. Franz Liszt's "Die Zelle" played from the speakers that were hitched onto the outside walls, delicately playing the music so it not only reached a few yards outside, but also reached the front yard. Some danced on the floor, while most stood on the edges and spoke to others, laughing calmly and happily at the comments and jokes shared.

Everyone dressed beautifully, as if they were at a ball rather than a wedding. Alec Evenson-Cullen stood on his porch that was attached to his new bedroom. Looking down from high above, he analyzed the people below him, thinking of himself as a God. Everyone looked fake in his eyes, all putting up a false pretense as they talked to neighbors, to fellow workers and old friends. They all seemed appreciative of the newer people, the ones who'd come a long way just to see this marriage happen.

Mrs. Cope flirted with Chief Swan, but he had no idea – he was too busy trying to peruse Sue Clearwater; who was already married and had a family. But she didn't let this get the best of her because she, too, was set after the widowed man. Alec scrutinized him the most, but dismissively studied the others.

His mother danced with her new husband on the floor, a smile on her face as the man said something in her ear. Alec glared, but quickly averted his eyes to another couple.

Emmett and his girlfriend Rosalie were in the shadows further out from the house, just barely in the woods. At first it was hard to recognize them, but Alec remembered the figures of the two. Emmett large and tall, Rosalie tall and flamboyant with the curves she proudly showed off.

Alec already didn't like his new big brother, but this made the hatred a little stronger. He disliked the way Emmett spoke, the way he was rude and the way he treated women like they were only his. He was an over bearing jerk who needed to be punished.

He pinned Rosalie up against a tree and Alec turned away from them, stepping back into his dull, box-filled room. A bare, ivory mattress was pushed up against the wall, waiting for the frame to be set up. Boxes were pushed against the wall, stacked high so someone could maneuver through the room. Alec missed his old room, the one he'd grown up in, the one he'd found solitude in.

Anger pulsated through his skin, making his jaw clench and his head throb. His vision grew blurry and he felt himself become dizzy. Leaning forward to the wooden floor, he shoved his hands in his pants pocket, immediately touching plastic. He pulled out his small, cylinder orange bottle and popped the white lid, quickly shaking two round pills into his pale palm. Without even thinking about it, he brought the pills into his mouth and swallowed them dry, feeling them in his throat as they slowly slid down.

"Knock, knock," a voice said, making Alec quickly put the bottle of pills back in his pocket.

"What are those?" the same voice asked.

Alec stared at the boy in his doorway, eyeing him like he as was piece of filth.

"None of your business," Alec retorted, staring at the bronze haired boy.

"Whatever," he muttered, glancing down at the floor before his eyes flashed to the room. He started to walk in, which made Alec a bit angry. Edward, Alec's other new step-brother, analyzed the walls, looking at the room as if it were his first time seeing them.

"Can I help you with something?" Alec asked, irritation swelling around his tone.

Edward snapped his attention back to the auburn haired boy, finally realizing he'd come up here for a purpose.

"Yeah, uh, your mom wants you," he said.

Alec smirked, walking past Edward.

Once beside the tall boy, he turned his head, stopping momentarily. "Don't you mean _our_ mom?"

"I wouldn't go that far," Edward replied, the same crooked smirk on his face.

"Don't let her hear you say that," Alec began as he walked past Edward and out of the room, "it would break her fragile, little heart."

Alec laughed at his own lie. His mother was a warrior. A rock.

Downstairs people covered the entire area of the house, making Alec wonder if the entire town, plus some, were here. It was uncanny, really, seeing as how the house could only hold so much. But then again, Dr. Cullen was one of the biggest and most known men in Forks; he'd definitely earned some compassion points with his profession. However, Alec didn't think he deserved to be treated all high and mighty. He was half mad at his mother, seeing as how a few days previous she'd told him it was just a small ceremony, almost like it was just the five of them.

He made his way outside, catching the soft breeze of the perfect weather outside. It calmed him immediately, or perhaps it was the pills he'd just taken.

He moved around groups of people, slipping through any cracks he could find so he could get to his mother. He bumped into someone suddenly, unsure of how he didn't see the body.

"Oh, sorry," the voice apologized, cheeks aflame with embarrassment. A set of wide, large brown eyes stared straight at him, eyelashes brushing down at the pink cheeks.

"It-it's okay," he stuttered, feeling his palms moisten.

The girl smiled.

"I'm Bella, you must be Esme's son," she said, sticking out her hand towards him. Alec wiped his left hand on his dress pants before putting his palm in hers.

"Yeah, Alec."

"It's really great to meet you, and I hope you like it here in Forks." She smiled brightly at Alec and he couldn't help but stare.

"Me too. It's a bit different here then Italy," he explained.

Her eyes grew wider and her jaw dropped. "Italy? Wow."

"Yeah, before then we lived in New York, so I'm sorta used to cold weather," he continued.

"Bella!" a voice interrupted. Both the two looked to their left, watching a tall boy make his way through the unnoticing crowd. Edward grabbed for Bella, taking her by the hand and pulled her onto the dance floor.

"See ya around," she said to Alec, an apologetic expression bestowed upon her.

"See ya," Alec mimicked, waving goodbye as he watched the two get lost in the music, not to mention the large group of teens who were dancing. He turned away then, looking for his mother who was the one dressed in only white. He spotted her at table by herself. She was looking at the people just like Alec had minutes ago. She didn't see his approach and jumped slightly when he sat beside her.

"Sorry," he said to her.

"It's alright," she spoke breathlessly, smiling at him.

"You wanted me?" he asked, but it was more of a statement.

"I did," she started. "I haven't seen you all night and I just wanted to make sure that you were okay. Have you been taking your medication?"

"I'm fine and yes, I just took some before I came downstairs. But I don't think it's working anymore."

She nodded her head. "We'll have to look into that."

There was a strong and potent silence between the two then. Their relationship had broken as soon as Esme told Alec that they were leaving Italy and moving back to the United States. Alec had grown a life in Italy; he had friends and even a girlfriend. He was happy there and instantly he'd grown into a depression at the sight of those tickets in his mother's hands. He was living in a Seattle apartment when Carlisle showed up in his life. He'd hardly known the man for a month when he asked his mother for her hand in marriage.

Alec had no choice but to be happy for her, especially now that he'd grown older, his emotions stronger.

He kept his mouth shut about how he knew things were unfair for him, but then he remembered the unfairness he'd brought suddenly upon his mother, knowing that he had no right to make himself happy and let her suffer.

_No, not again_, Alec thought. _Not ever._

"Are you getting along with the boys?" Esme questioned her son.

"Profoundly," he replied lifelessly, suddenly bored and tired.

"Alright, why don't you go off and make some new friends, okay sweets?" she suggested, rubbing his back.

"Kay, love you," he said as he got up and walked away.

-:-

"Stop cheating!" Emmett roared as he dramatically attempted to throw his game controller at Alec.

"Stop being such a sore loser!" Alec said back, smacking Edward in the chest.

Edward was in a constant state of laughter do to seeing his big brother in such distress. Given the situation of Emmett continuing to lose his favorite game, it was making him grow huffy. The only thing he seemed good at now, with Alec beating him at everything, was swearing and growing red. It was very humorous to the two seventeen year olds, seeing as how they both could pick on the nineteen year olds.

The three of them sat in the living room, Emmett and Alec on the edges of their banana chairs and Edward on the couch beside them, half reading and half watching the two banter and bicker. It was the first time he wasn't completely annoyed with the sound system that his big brother would hook up when playing his obnoxious, loud video games.

The two boys started to play another round, but just as things were getting intense, Emmett grew angrier at the fact that he was losing once again.

"Fucker! Stop doing that!" he screamed at Alec.

Alec had done a move in which he done six times before, making Emmett upset with his repetition fighting moves; they were the only ones Alec knew. But as Emmett's frustration became more potent, Alec's started to grow, too.

"If I knew how to play this game we wouldn't be having any problems!" he yelled back.

And that's when it started.

"It's not my fault you're a wimp!"

"Are you fucking kidding me? What does that have to do with never playing a certain video game before?"

"You do pussy moves because you're afraid I'll beat you and make you look even more like a pathetic kid."

"Oh, yeah, right. Come on, Emmett! Don't be such a fucking dickface and get over the fact that your spoiled and want things to be done your way!"

"And why don't you get over the fact that your mom is fucking my dad and you have no choice but to be the little black sheep!"

That was too much for Alec.

He was raging and wouldn't listen to Emmett's harsh comments.

It was if the world split in two; one good, one bad. It was a familiar feeling to Alec. A hundred emotions going through him but the killers' instinct being the leader.

He dropped the controller and lunged for Emmett, only knocking him down from the sudden and quick tackle. The boys collided on the couch beside them, making Edward look up at the noise. He ignored the banter, but the silence and grunting woke him up from his reading.

Alec's face was red, as was Emmett's. Both the boys locked onto each other, trying to find a good hit. Emmett kicked Alec on the thigh as he tried to push the small boy away. It would be easy for Emmett to do something harmful to someone so small, but Alec was fast. He threw his fists into the larger boy's face, his eyes locked hard on the blood flowing out of Emmett's nose.

"Guys!" Edward intervened, trying to pull Alec off of his big brother. "Come on, stop!"

Edward grabbed hold of Alec's hood that was resting on his back. He pulled hard and managed to get Alec a safe and equal distance from the boy who lay bleeding, slightly unconscious.

"Are you fucking crazy!?" Edward screamed once he took in his brother's state. "You're going to kill him!"

"Good," Alec purred, his eyes dark and wicked, blood on his hands.

Edward stared at the small brunette. The tight smile on the boy's face and the pleased looked in his eyes sent a shiver down his spine. Never seeing such a crazed look in a person before made Edward unsure about this boy, knowing something bad lingered with him.

Alec smiled once more before turning and walking up the stairs, staring down at the two brothers from the railing until he disappeared behind a wall.

"Wha-what the fuck happened?" Emmett moaned.

"That's what I would like to know," Edward muttered to himself.

Alec lay in his bed that night, completely under control and calm. He wasn't one hundred percent sure what had happened hours ago, just that something wavered in him and took over. Alec hadn't always had such hard problems with his anger, in fact, he wasn't always angry. But over the years he'd become slightly bi-polar, something that took hold of his emotions without his permission. He'd willingly take medication for it in order to be himself, but still, there was something wrong – something he was scared of.

It was almost midnight now, and he couldn't sleep. He tried, but yet he could never accomplish the task of falling asleep. The doctor said there might be some side affects to the new medication he was taking, one of which was insomnia, and another being depression.

He felt depressed.

He was trying to be a part of this new family, but his disease was making it harder and harder to do so. It might have gone a little better if Esme and he told the family of their past, but Esme was scared. She was a coward, as was her child.

It frustrated Alec that they were keeping secrets from their new family, but he knew that if they were to find out about the skeletons in their closet things would not end well. They were right from keeping their family in the dark, but Alec knew they couldn't live with their ghosts forever.

Three weeks in with his new family and already he was at a rough start, not something that he was proud about. He'd gone so long without a family, and sure, at first he didn't like the idea of actually having one, but that was mainly an excuse. Alec was mad that he had not seen the marriage coming. But now that he'd gotten to like the idea of having a dad again he was lit with bliss.

"Why does everything I touch turn to shit?" he asked himself then, but he hadn't expected a response.

"Maybe because you're depressed and suicidal." He recognized the voice immediately. A bright smile grew on his face and he turned his attention to his open porch doors.

"Just as long as I'm not homicidal, right?"_ Ironic_, he then thought to himself.

"You read my mind," the voice replied.

He sat up in his bed, turning his lamp on. Bella's frame walked towards him, slightly confused but yet happy.

"What are you doing here?" Alec asked her, watching her glanced around the room.

"This used to Edward's room," she replied, her lip getting caught between her teeth.

"Oh." Bella came here for Edward, not Alec.

"But seeing as how he's not here, I'll have to settle for you," she spoke afterwards, sitting next to Alec.

"Mm, yes. I'm great when it comes to settling," he joked.

She laughed. "You better be."

Alec knew the words didn't mean anything beyond the surface, but the thought of him being with her sent him into a whirlwind of euphoria and sudden pleasure. He thought about his life with this girl possibly in it, and the image did not displease him. He already knew he was interested in Bella, but now he could confirm it.

He could confirm it in the way he'd make Bella laugh.

He could confirm it in the way she willingly grazed him with parts of her body.

He could confirm in the way her brown eyes stared adoringly at him.

Bella licked her lips, her eyes staying glued onto his. Alec felt a cold shiver down his spine, forgetting the fact that it was from the open window. He wanted to think it was from something else - from the intensity that was happening in this dim lit bedroom.

He leaned forward, inhaling Bella's natural scent. He felt like purring at the hit from her breath.

"What are you doing?" she whispered.

He blinked, immediately recoiling from Bella and staring at the floor below him.

"Sorry," he muttered.

The awkwardness that entered the room then was unwanted and distinct. Alec felt his palms moisten and his breathing hitch up.

He figured Bella wanted it, too.

"I-I guess I'll go track down Edward's room," she began to stand, the bed creaking slightly. "It would be nice if you told me where it's been relocated."

"Uh, right across from this one," he replied, blue eyes stuck on his pale feet.

She nodded, staring at Alec. She, too, knew that the tension that stiffened the air around them was affecting their friendship in a small way, and she didn't want to see that go.

"You should go the movies with us sometime," she said, trying her hardest to bring a smile back on his face.

He nodded his head before scooting back into his bed.

"Sure. Night," he said to her, snapping off his lamp. Bella stood in darkness for a few moments before quietly opening the door and sneaking out into the hallway and then into Edward's room.

Alec lay wide awake in his bed, trying his hardest to listen to Bella waking up Edward.

That's when things hit a turning point – that's when Alec grew…mad.

-:-

Alec sat in the backyard, a blue rain jacket zipped up snuggly with the hood hiding him from the sky and rain above him. He picked at the damp grass, making a childish nest of green in front of him. His eyes, which were full of a familiar darkness, followed Edward as he walked back and forth a few feet in front of Alec.

He was on the phone with Bella, whom Alec just figured out that she and her new brother were officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

He didn't even try to stop the second amount of anger from piling up inside him.

"Seriously?" Edward laughed the question, stopping mid-walk so he could smile widely and shake his head with the humor. "Your mom is so weird!"

He began walking again, Alec watching him with preying eyes.

"…like in that one movie!"

"…you're kidding, right?"

"…what'd he say?"

"…this weekend. I haven't been camping in years. And now with you coming, it'll just make it even more kick-ass."

That was enough to break Alec out of his trance. He blinked twice before collecting his thoughts.

Carlisle suggested that a family camping trip would be a good way to bond, seeing as how they wouldn't have the normal, modern day necessities and they could easily find their ways into each other's depth and soul. Alec really didn't care for the trip, especially as of lately with the tension he and Emmett had fallen upon. And with Edward in a relationship with Bella, it made it all the worse.

But now, hearing that Bella would be joining them _all_, well, this pleased Alec to the fullest.

Even Edward knew that there was something sinister about the smile that captivated Alec's face.

-:-

"I just don't understand what happened," Esme sighed as she pitched up one of the three tents.

"Who knows," Alec replied in a bored tone. He watched his mother from behind, his hands in his jeans pockets and his eyes stuck on Bella and Edward, who were casually flirting as they pitched up their own tent. But they weren't the only ones; Emmett and Rosalie were also putting up their tent, laughing and joyously touching.

Alec still wondered how Rosalie ended up coming along. He didn't like her, in fact, he despised her. She was everything he hated in a person. She was vain and superficial, not to mention she treated Alec like a child and was completely vague at the things going around her. It angered him to see her perfectly sculpted face.

He had to breathe deep breaths and close his eyes in order to get a hold of himself. This didn't go unnoticed by Esme.

"Alec, are you alright? Have you been taking your medication?"

Alec snapped his eyes open, a faux grin taking place on his face.

"Of course," he lied. "I'm just bored and tired. I think I'll go take a walk."

He quickly sauntered off onto a trail that led him in a full circle back to the campsite. As he pondered his thoughts and anger, he couldn't help but to wonder if he had taken things too far when he'd dumped his medication down the bathroom sink after he learned about Bella's late night adventures with Edward. He knew the consequences of this, but he figured since it had been so long since his last meltdown that things would be okay.

But even he knew that that wasn't true.

He wanted something to happen. He was tired of hiding who he truly was.

Once back at the campsite, he was immediately aware that one of the two cars was missing.

"Where's my mom?" he asked worriedly.

"She wasn't going to let Carlisle bail out on us, so she went to drag him back here. Which she should. The dick planned this whole thing," Emmett replied, pulling Rosalie to his Jeep.

"Where are _you_ going?" Alec asked, too many emotions going through him; he felt ill.

"Where ever the fuck we want to go," Rosalie sneered. "Why don't you be a good little boy and gather fire wood."

He didn't even think about his next move. All in all, Alec was gone, just with one thought and his body.

He watched the two high-school sweethearts disappear in the jeep, knowing that they'd go far enough to be left alone, but not too far to get eaten up by some kind of predatorily animal. For Alec, though, they were at perfect distance – a perfect grave.

Almost an hour later, the sun began to set and with the knowledge that Esme was coming back alone, Alec began his own adventure.

He walked over to Bella and Edward, who were both trying their hardest to light a camp fire.

"I'm going," Alec said, turning his attention onto the darkening woods behind him.

"Going where?" Bella asked, but was ignored. Alec disappeared into the forests, only with shoes on his feet and the clothes on his back. His pockets were mostly empty, if you didn't count his cell phone, wallet and pocket knife. But besides those things, he was just winging it.

He happened upon tire tracks, which clearly matched the Jeep's. It made his life a bit easier, seeing as how he had a some-what fresh lead on where they were.

He walked along the track, eyes staring blindly at the open world in front of him.

Emmett and Rosalie were bunkered down near a small lake, which was more of a deep pond then anything. It was cold and murky, yet it was worthy of a nice skinny-dip, quoted from Emmett himself when Rosalie began to judge the waters.

"Trust me, we'll be fine," he said, wrapping his arms around her body.

She sighed and stared languid into his blue eyes.

"I do trust you. I just don't trust the big-foot, elfin fish swimming beneath our naked bodies," she simplified, sort of speak.

Emmett laughed at the blonde, dimples magnifying on his cheeks. "You're kidding, right? Rose. This water is fine and there's hardly any fish. It's just like dirty bath water."

Her eyes grew wide, violet circles, panicked. "And that's supposed to make me feel better?"

"Rose, come on. You said you always wanted to do it, and now we've got the chance. We're so far out that no one will show up unexpected," he continued.

"What about your mom and Edward? What if they get worried or something?"

Emmett moved away from her, kicking his shoes off. "I told Ed what we planned on doing. He's got us covered. Relax."

Rosalie watched as she tried to get accustomed to the cold air, looking around at the mysterious woods circling the two. She didn't feel safe here, nor did she feel like they were alone. But as soon as Emmett's shirt came off and she saw his fit abs and chest, her hormones kicked into overdrive, pushing all negative thoughts and feelings behind her.

Slowly, she stripped down to her underwear, making Emmett howl in appreciation. He slipped off his jeans and was attempting to take his black boxers off, that was until Rosalie's hands caught his hips.

"Emmy-bear," she began, pouting.

"Rosie-cakes," he replied in a mocking tone.

"Do you know how hot I am for you?" she asked.

He smiled at her, almost in a wicked, sly motion and sauntered towards. He put his large, paw like hands on her hips and he pulled her quickly into him. His lips feasted upon hers for a millisecond and then he wiggled out of his boxers and jumped into the water, splashing water around him.

Rosalie was sprinkled with the cold water, goose-bumps erupting on her skin. Though, she didn't wait long to disrobe the rest of her thin clothing, not wasting her time as she joined Emmett in the water she so despised a few minutes ago.

The two so childish played in the water, splashing at each other and pulling each other under. But things grew from play to pleasure in a matter of seconds, and the two couldn't control their feelings that were now being a dominate feature in both their faces and bodies.

Little did they both know that they were being watched.

Of course not by a bear or a hiker. They were being watched, scrutinized and even judged, by someone they both knew.

Alec.

Given his persistence to find them both, he'd happened across an abandoned camp. Tents were left and destroyed by the weather. A fire pit full of rotted, burnt wood and garbage surrounded the flat, dry circle. But to his luck, Alec came across a rusted axe, and he knew exactly how he would be using it.

Rosalie and Emmett fooled around in the water, hands in areas they wouldn't normally be. Their lips wandered on the flesh of the other, eyes full of fire-lit passion. By now the sun was mostly hidden behind the tall, snowy peaks, only slightly illuminating the low sky.

Moans echoed from Rosalie's lips, pushing Alec further into the opening where the two had been when they were still wearing clothes. With the axe, he pushed the forgotten clothes around, deciding fire would soon be a variable in this equation.

In the water, Emmett's head disappeared beneath the waters and Rosalie's breathing picked up. Her back arched and her eyes shut, but not in a tired fashion. It was quite obvious as to what was going on, and Alec was surprised that both were oblivious to him. He was dead obvious; cold eyes set on the two.

The boy's head reappeared and he gasped with a laugh.

"Tease," the girl replied, breathless.

He was even more so out of breath.

"Not for me," he mocked with a wink. He was beginning to attempt to change the spot he was floating in, that was until he caught sight on Alec.

"What the fuck!" he cursed, his expression suddenly beyond angry. The blonde snapped her attention to where Emmett's hostile glance was. She nearly screamed at the sight of the skinny teen.

"Perv!" she screeched, covering her naked chest. That didn't really help.

"What are you doing here!?" Emmett roared.

Alec made no show to respond. He simply stared at the two, a look of what seemed to be humor on his face. The two headed for dry land, both irritated at Alec for killing the mood.

"Your brother fucking sucks," Rosalie muttered.

"Step-brother," Emmett corrected. As the two got out of the water, they immediately reached for their clothes, but were unable to pull them from underneath Alec, whom was standing on them.

"Give us our clothes," Rosalie demanded with a fault in her voice – a crack. She kept her arms crossed, trying to cover the bare areas. It was obvious that she was very uncomfortable, and that had Alec immediately giddy.

"Wow, Rose," he spoke. "You're not the bitch you pretend to be, huh? Just a little girl trying to act like she's not scared of anything – anyone. I'm amazed, really, I am." Sarcasm, his specialty.

Emmett's jaw clenched. "Don't be an asshole," he began. "Give us our clothes and leave." Alec's eyes snapped to the large boy, who was in a defensive position.

"And, Emmett!" Look at you! All nude and acting like you actually care!" Alec had never felt so euphoric.

"Shut up!" the boy replied, a deep growl in the back of his throat.

Rosalie coughed up a response, forgetting the predicament she was in. "Of course he cares. Now get out of here kid. Go be a little creep somewhere else."

Emmett kept his gaze on Alec.

The auburn haired boy smirked, his baby blue eyes moving onto Rosalie's flawless, yet anxiety-filled face, which soon took over her entire being.

"I wouldn't say he cared, Rose, but then again, maybe he just doesn't care for you. You should hear the squeals from the pretty, little skanky pigs late at night in Emmett's bedroom."

Dead silence.

"Maybe if you're lucky," he continued. "You'll hear more than just one. I know I do."

Rosalie's strange, violet eyes were wide in shock, her mouth agape as she slowly looked at the boy beside her.

"What?" she croaked, complete anguish in her tone.

"He's lying," Emmett replied, voice broken and full of nostalgia.

Alec smiled again and brought the axe from behind his back, resting both hands on the stem and heaving it onto his left shoulder. Emmett watched him do this, fear in his eyes – petrified, frozen. Rosalie stared at Emmett in hurt, until she saw the gleam off the point of the sharp silver.

"Trust me. I'm not."

Rosalie didn't even get a chance to turn completely and see the axe perfectly. It came down toward her, ripping through the flesh of her shoulder. Alec could feel the vibrations of ripping through her skin and muscles, even her bones. Little ripples of joy and pleasure buzzed through is fingers and throughout him. There was only one scream, but plenty of blood.

The large boy fell to the ground in shock, unsure as to what he was seeing – not wanting to believe it. Rosalie's body soon joined his, her eyes damp yet cloudy, staring around blindly.

The poor thing was still alive and conscious, making Alec slightly disappointed in her will to survive, or at least, what she would do if she had a chance at survival, at how her body would react. His left leg lifted and planted itself against her reddened, bare back. He gripped the wooden part of the axe and pushed her down, a slight groan escaping her still mouth. His hands gripped the axe handle tightly as he tugged it out, rocking it back and forth out of her body, slicing up bits and pieces of the inside of her right shoulder. A bone dislodged and a fountain of red broke free, spraying over and onto Emmett, whom was locked in a frozen state.

Alex stared at his next victim for a moment, the same smirk on his face, before he threw the axe back down on the girl's body, this time right through Rosalie's skull. The sound of bone crushing was arousing, and the blood just seemed to be hypnotic at first sight. After he took in the moment of his first kill in nearly four years, he shot back in reality, his mind going blank for a moment.

"What?" Alec whispered to himself, completely unaware and unsure of what was going on. It was as if a light switch had been turned on, leaving Alec to only see his footprints.

"…Fucking bastard!" a voice screamed and Alec fell to the ground, the right side of his body rigged in pain. The torture running through his chest and limbs was enough to snap him back in his previous mind set. Emmett's fist collided with Alec's jaw, loosening a tooth and tainting the dazed boy's tongue with blood.

It didn't take long for Alec to strike back, his own fist matching up with Emmett's nose. The larger boy recoiled, his hand cupping his leaking nose. He stopped long enough to comfort himself and gave Alec a chance to slither away. He removed the aex from the corpse and stood on his feet, swaying, his head pounding.

Emmett stood as well, eyes darker than Alec's.

It knocked Alec away from what was going on, leaving his mind with a blank once more. He dropped the axe immediately at the sight around him.

His head compulsed as he tried to stitch the pieces back together.

"No," he cried, shaking his and swallowing back the bile and letting tears fall freely.

Emmett's fists tightened, as did his jaw. Alec looked up at the boy, fear taking over.

"Emmett, please," he begged, falling onto his knees. "I'm sick. I didn't mean to do anything."

Emmett's actions wavered, and his own emotions took over as he watched the resolve in Alec's face.

"You killed her!" he shouted, a horrific cry in his throat.

"I'm sick, really sick. I didn't to, honestly."

Alec still couldn't fathom the fact that Emmett believed him. The first chance he got, he sent the axe soaring into Emmett's chest, a grunting noise escaping the boy's mouth - and blood. He pulled it out and to a few swings, satisfied for all that he had done.

But he wasn't finished.

Not yet.

-:-

"Where are they?" Esme asked, pacing around the fire.

"I'm sure they're fine," Bella said, trying to put the older woman's thought to rest.

"Yeah, Esme," Edward began. "Emmett's a big boy. He'll take care of them."

Esme wasn't so sure about that.

Upon arrival to the campsite, Esme had found out that Alec hadn't been taking his medication for nearly three weeks. She knew her son better than anyone, especially when he wasn't entirely her son. Esme and Alec were keeping a large secret from the family, and she knew that tonight's events, whatever they were, would cause these secrets to fall through the walls that she so carefully had built up.

She needed to warn Bella and Edward, just in case they worse were to happen.

And they would.

Esme stopped pacing, which got both the teens attention.

"I need to tell you both something, and you have to promise me to never speak of it outside of us," Esme began, sitting near the fire. They both sat in front of her, fingers intertwined and expressions flamed in curiosity.

"Almost four years ago, Alec and I flew to Italy and lived there. But we moved there for a reason."

Edward cut in, "And why was that?"

Esme blinked rapidly, almost as if she was shocked he didn't already know.

"Why else do people flee countries to live in a new one? To get away. To change. Alec and I started a new life there, only so we could get away from our old one…Or should I say _his_ old one."

She took a deep breath before the cracks opened and she reviled everything.

"Alec got sick, and not your average fever and flu sick, but mentally sick. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia, but only after his father died…After Alec killed his father."

"What?" Bella chocked out, her hands cupping her mouth.

Esme felt the need to defend her son, she always felt that. "He didn't mean to, it was the illness – it had driven him mad, so mad that he took it out on the first person who really affected it. Alec feels horrible about his father's death, and he wants to get better."

"But," Edward added.

"But," Esme began, growing tired, "he's stopped taking his medication and truth be told, the medication never helped. All it ever did was help Alec sort out his thoughts. But now that he's stopped taking it, I can only imagine the worse."

"And this is why you're worried?" Bella questioned, moving over to where Esme was. She wrapped her arms around the older woman, slightly unsure if this was the best way to comfort someone like her.

"A little bit, yeah. Alec hasn't done anything really bad for years, and I just hope that he doesn't relapse tonight."

"What if he already has?" Edward doomed the question, eyes bored.

"Edward!" Bella hissed, feeling Esme tense slightly.

"Don't say that," Esme warned.

The bronze haired boy ignored her and left the small circle, sauntering off towards the edge of the forest. That was until Alec stepped out, looking slightly breathless.

"Whoa!" Edward shouted, not seeing Alec. He jumped back a little, eyeing the smaller boy.

"Relax, Eddie. I'm not the Boogeyman." Alec laughed at his own joke and walked over towards the cooler. He opened it and fished out a soda, popping the tab and chugging it.

"Where have you been? Where's Emmett and Rosalie?" Esme asked, standing on slowly making her way to her son.

Alec removed the can from his lips and crushed it in his palm before dropping it on the ground.

"What am I, their baby sitter or something? I have no idea where they are. Probably skinny-dipping or getting high," he responded in an honest tone, burping as he went for the food that was made nearly an hour ago.

Edward chimed in, "Where've you been, then?"

"Hiking, dur. Checking out the night life and all," Alec replied. He took in the three, noticing their wary, apprehensive expressions. It didn't take long for him to catch on.

"Huh. So I guess you guys know my secret. Big deal. And for your information, I was not killing the two love birds. If I had been, wouldn't I have some blood on me or something? Any traces of being a recent murderer?"

Alec didn't have a scrap of evidence on him. Of course, if the others were to take a closer peak and feel the material, they'd realize it's wet.

None of them dared.

"Actually, you may want to go find them. I heard some things about a rogue black bear out there, and it like, eats people and stuff like that."

Edward didn't believe Alec one bit. He had seen the hostility of his new brother before, and once Esme filled in the blanks of his mystery, it all came together. Emmett and Rosalie were dead; he knew that – he could taste it in the air. But whether he accused Alec of this, nothing would matter. He had Bella wrapped around his little, pale finger.

"Alec," Esme began, walking towards her son. "Tell me the truth. What did you do?"

The brunette boy look appalled that his mother didn't believe him, but she was much like Edward. She knew things beyond the surface – beyond her son.

"I told you. I don't know," he nearly shouted.

Everyone was shocked when Esme slapped her son harshly, leaving a pink mark on his left, freckled cheek. Alec's hand touched the spot where he'd been stained, his blue eyes watering as he stared at his mother.

He grew angry then, but he also grew honest.

"You're right, I'm a liar. I killed them."

Bella was the first to speak. "What?" she gasped, running over towards Alec, tripping.

He watched her on the ground as she tried to get herself up, but something in him ticked and he pushed her back down with his foot, shoving her harshly into the ground.

Edward leaped towards the two, shoving Alec back and off of Bella. Esme helped the teen girl up, who was covered in dirt.

Alec didn't shove Edward back, he only laughed and walked away, stepping onto another hiking trail, Esme calling after him.

"Alec! Get back here! Why would you do such a thing? You promised me!" The last words were enough to stop Alec.

Without turning around he spoke, "I did promise, but we both know I could never hold on to something like that. I'm a killer, mother. It's who I am, and it's time that we both accepted it."

He started off again, but was followed by Bella. She was chasing after him, calling his name and begging him to stop and listen to her. Alec was surprised that she'd be stupid enough to follow him like she was, that she was full of hope of him being someone different.

In a sick way, he liked it…liked it enough to punish her for it.

When he entered a new camp ground he noticed right away a cliff. He walked towards it, looking below to see flat terrain. It was nearly 30 feet.

_What a way to go_, he thought to himself, turning back to face Bella.

Esme and Edward weren't around, which nearly caused Alec to go back to find out what was going on. Little did he know the two were back at the neutral camp ground. Edward had gone a bit mad, intentions on killing Alec (or beating him severely). Esme wouldn't let that happen, though. It was her son, they were both her son. She didn't want to see either hurt, but throughout this she forgot about Bella, who was in serious danger.

Alec had fished out his pocket knife, making Bella stop her ramblings about Alec opening up to her and telling her what happened. He would never open up to anyone, especially the girl who started all this. In fact, he felt the need to make her feel guilty – make her suffer emotionally and mentally before her death.

But he knew he didn't have much time.

"This is all your fault," he simple started.

"What?" she croaked, hands up as she eyed Alec and the knife in his hands.

"No one would be hurt right now if you wouldn't have chosen Cullen over me," he finished, circling Bella as if she were his prey.

She narrowed her eyes. "What are you talking about? I never had to choose…"

"Wrong. The night you ended up in my room, there was something there. A spark. And before, around the house and when we went out, there were many times when you would flirt with me and treat me more than a friend. You led me on and fucked my brother instead, leaving me like this. You are the reason Emmett and Rosalie are dead. All of this is your fault."

He said it with so much anger and venom that each word seemed emphasized.

The only words Bella really ever heard were 'led me on'.

"Alec, I think you got some of the messages-"

She stopped herself.

Now was not a good time to argue with him, especially with his grip tighter and the smaller space between them.

"You're right," she restarted. "And I'm sorry I did those things; they weren't my intentions. If I knew how you really felt about me, maybe things would have gone differently-"

He abruptly cut in, "If things would have gone different you would have what? Chose me instead? That's horseshit, Bella. I'm not stupid. I'm not a child."

He took a step forward, and grabbed the back of Bella's neck with his left hand, pulling her face into his. He pressed his lips against hers, his tongue darting in her shocked mouth and she pushed against his chest.

One second it was roughness, the next it was pain.

The knife entered Bella's body, her stomach, causing spasms of pain to rock through her body. He pulled the knife out with a twist and grinned at the sound of her knees hitting the ground. He folded the pocket knife up and put it back in his pocket, walking towards the edge of the cliff and admired the play backs of his kills tonight.

"Oh my God!" Edward screamed as he entered the site, running and falling beside Bella. He pulled her into his body, blood pulling on the ground beside them.

"Bella, oh, fuck. Bella, it's okay."

It wasn't okay.

Bella was gone, her last breath taken when Edward wrapped his arms around her.

Death's embrace.

Edward cradled Bella's body in his own, her head against his chest as his legs sufficed as a bed. He cried, but mostly from the shock at what he was seeing. He rocked her back and forth, not sure what to do. There was nothing he could do. He was stuck – lost. Bella had become his life in such a short matter of time, and now she was gone.

All because of him.

He looked up at the young boy, who stared at Bella as if he was finally registering her death. Edward could see a flicker of two different emotions in Alec, one serene with triumph, the other shocked and lost – just like Edward was. Esme noticed this, too. It wasn't the first time she had seen her son like this, she only wished she'd never have to witness it again.

"Who are you tonight?" Esme questioned in a brutal tone.

Edward echoed her, "Who are you tonight?" He wasn't asking Alec like she had, but questioning her choice in the question. She ignored the upset, yet curious boy.

"Who am I tonight," Alec started. "Neither a question or a statement if you ask me. It's a description. A defying word that bounds me to whom I wish I were. I am never two people." He paused momentarily, almost as if he was finally figuring out the truth for himself. And like the saying goes, the truth hurts.

"I am never two people…Because it takes one person to make ones decisions – one person to decide rather if they are sad or mad, if they are happy or in love. You decide if you're heart is broken, because in reality, your heart can never break, not really."

His blue eyes shifted towards Bella, whose frozen, numb body lay both Edward's and his mother's arms.

"You make your path, just like you make your own bed."

A noise came from his mouth, a whimper, a stalled cry. "I've made mine, and now I must lie in it."

Without hesitation or self-questioning, he jumped off the cliff, Esme crying out and reaching for him.

Certain death was to follow and the two of them knew that he didn't have a chance. Four died that night, but only one body wouldn't be buried.

His.

* * *

**A/N** -

Thanks go to my many supporters.

Super, huge thanks to TRDancer, IChimpz and MuffinsRoxSox for keeping me up late at night while I tried my hardest to write.

I hope you enjoyed it, whether it was cliched and obvious :)


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